Tag Archives: teens

I CAN READ THE TRUTH (I’m girl, I’m smart and I know everything) AS A 22 YEAR-OLD,…

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I found this excerpt from a review that Vanessa Van Patten did on anThe Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) yesterday.  “At the end of the book (I am not going to tell you what happens with Paul), there are a series of questions parents can ask kid readers to talk to their kids about the issues in the book. I LOVE this, the fact that I can read it as a 22 year-old, my mom could read it, my little sister can read it and we could all take away a great message and have something to talk about.”

Vanessa Van Patten

What do you want in the next edition of The Truth(I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything)?

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19aThe book is selling so fast that I am already thinking about reprinting.   The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) was #6 in the top 100 on Amazon today in the category of BEING A TEEN.  Thanks to everyone who helped with that rank by buying the book!  And thanks for telling me that yes, there is a place for the world of positive psychology and fiction to merge!

So, I thought you might want to share some ideas with me.  In the next edition, would you like: 1. more secret diary entries that have never been public before?  2. Pages from the second book in the series where the girl is a year older?  and/or 3. More questions and activities you can do after you read the book?  Please let me know what you would prefer!

Tips to Help You Communicate With Your Teen

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15aToday I had the pleasure of discovering a wonderful blog, www.wearyparent.com with a great article, entitled 9 Tips to Help You Communicate With Your Teen. I left a message emphasizing how great the list is, and also mentioned how important it is to be a role model to your teen.  It is not only what we say, and how well we listen, but how we live our own lives. That means it does matter how gracious we are, how kind we are, whether we are generous of spirit and eager to not hold grudges or be petty. It does matter what we say, but often it matters just as much how we say it. Can we cushion a criticism with some sweet honey? Can we wait until the right moment to say something personal when no one else is listening. It all matters!  If you think back to being a teen, can you remember when someone was gentle in what she had to say, instead of rough? Or when someone was extra kind? I can and those people are still with me today. I’ll say ‘thank you’ right now to Mr. Masters who made me feel good playing the violin, even though I really wasn’t very good at it, and Mr. and Mrs. Sylvester who always knew how to boost up my spirits when some boy I thought I was in love with, had dropped them down so low, I could hardly muster the strength to answer the phone.

 

Enjoy four of the tips and then go to www.wearyparent.com to read the rest of the tips!

  1. Give her your undivided attention. We’re parents. We’re busy. But we need to make time for our kids. Sometimes it feels like they’ve gotten so independent they don’t need us anymore. But they do. Put the Blackberry away. Shut down your laptop and just concentrate on your teen.
  2. Fight fair. Don’t bring up the past. Don’t say, “You always do this. Remember in the 2nd grade when I couldn’t get you to…” That’s not going to help anything. Stick to the issue at hand. Present your case. And then really listen to your teen’s rebuttal. Try to be understanding, but still be firm.
  3. Share your day. We all know what the answer to “how as school today?” So instead of asking that question, tell your teen about your day. When you open up, it may get him to open up. Tell him about a funny conversation you had with a co-worker. Or about somebody that really ticked you off that day and see if he has any advice. Get him talking.
  4. Don’t force him. Ask “Do you want to talk?” and if the answer is “no” then respect that. Sometimes teens (and sometimes parents) just want to be left alone. But let him now you are there if and when he is ready to talk.

First Positive Psychology Fiction Book, The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) is a Hit!

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Tonight I was at a book signing in Howell, New Jersey at the Barnes & Noble there. As I was meeting and greeting some many different people, and busily signing books, I found myself explaining how The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) is so different from other books for girls, tweens, teens and moms. For one thing, it is based on Positive Psychology principles that encourage living up to one’s potential, celebrating our strengths and holding on to our most authentic selves as we grow.

On the other hand, rather than being a typical self-help book, it is a true fictiional read. It is a girl’s diary and one quickly becomes involved with the girl and her life. There is a mystery to be solved and lots of action. It is a fun read.

Also the book can be used after one reads it for endless discussions as the topics brought up in the book are vital to growing up, and even to being a woman.

Soon on this blog, I’ll be taking you through pages and sharing ideas for discussion with you.

Author helps teens, moms connect

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BY LAURIE LAWLESS
Hour Staff Writer

As a young girl, does your life seem complicated? As a parent, does your daughter and her adolescent issues seem confusing and incomprehencible?

Well wonder no more, because Norwalk native, Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein has written a new book to help struggling pre-teens and their non-understanding parents. “The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart, and I know everything),” is a fiction diary written by Holstein through the eyes of an 8- to 10-year-old girl.

“I became aware that children and moms need a way to build self esteem. I wanted something that could catch the heart and spirit of girls and maybe their moms too,” explained Holstein.

Holstein had done extensive research before writing this book, which was released in February, and believes people might actually be surprised by the amount of depth in the story. The book touches on self esteem, crushes, school bullies, inside struggles and the development and growth of young teens.

“We need to find ways that people are affected by what they read. A fictional diary can be very moving. In order to make change in our lives we have to be moved, not just convinced,” explained Holstein.

Holstein said she hopes that just as many parents read the book as do young girls. She said she believes it is important for parents to remember how crucial the pre-teen years can be. At the end of the book, a list of questions is given. Holstein hopes that parents and their children can tackle these questions together.

“I hope it will boost a girl or teen. For the mothers, I hope it will help her see how her daughter of child is feeling inside,” she said.

Holstein is a licensed positive phycologist in New Jersey and Massachusetts. She has held her private practices for more than 25 years. Holstein also worked as a school psychologist, a teacher and a case study researcher.

She has written five other books: “The Truth, I’m Ten, I’m Smart and I Know Everything,” “Delight!” “The Enchanted Self,” “Recipes For Enchantment, The Secret Ingredient is You!,” and “Feel Good Stories.”

She is the daughter of Dr. Harry A. Becker, a past superintendent of the schools in Norwalk. While he was in office, Becker made various positive changes to the Norwalk School System. According to Holstein, he also founded Norwalk Community College.

Those who have read and enjoyed Holsteins book, may not have to wait long for the next one to appear. This book is just the first in a series.

“I’m almost done with the next book. Now she’ll be 10-12. The next will be 12-14,” she said.

Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein will have a book signing at 3 p.m. today at Borders in Stamford, at 3 p.m. today at Borders, 1041 High Ridge Road, Stamford. For more information, call 968-9700.

Kids, Tweens and Teens with Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein interviewed Venessa Van Patten, author of Your Grounded!

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In this week”s podcast I interview Venessa Van Patten, who is the author of Your Grounded!  She is a remarkable young woman who has actually done research on the thoughts, actions and feelings of teen-agers.  Listen to the inside scoop!  We discuss her research, her growing up her book and of course The Truth (I”m a girl, I”m smart and I know everything).  This is a great show.

Right click here and choose “Save Target As..” to Download the Mp3

Dr. Sandra Prince-Embury, Resili ency Expert, Guest on Dr. Holstein’s radio show, Kids Tweens and Tenns, A Positive Psychologist Looks at All Three, on www.internetvoicesradio.com

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Today, May 12, 2008 Dr. Sandra Prince-Embury was Dr. Holstein’s guest on her radio show, Kids, Tweens and Teens, A Positive Psychologist Looks at all Three on www.internetvoicesradio.com.  This show is recorded and archived and available 24/7 for downloading and as a podcast.  Dr. Prince Embury discussed Dr. Holstein’s new book, The Truth,(I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything).  She mentioned how important the book is for tweens and teens, giving them a model for the skills of self awareness and expression which are so critical for tweens and teens.  The girl is able to verbalize her feelings in her own words and actually speaks so naturally, that the reader feels she is really talking to her.   Her honesty and her capacity to adjust to disappointments, even around the failings of her parents are also important issues for youngsters developmentally. 

Dr. Sandra Prince Embury is a nationally known expert in the field of Resiliency, having developed The Resiliency Scales for Children and Adolescents.  Come and listen to the show!  If you have kids-it is a must!

Kids, Tweens and Teens, A Positive Psychologist Looks at All Three!-radio show

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MEDIA ALERT

Who:        Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein will interview Andrea Fuller, CEO of Work It! Inc., and creator of Work It! Book Collection, is a veterinarian at Seaside Zoo in San Francisco. The mission of her books is to encourage girls to think BIG about the future and have fun! Her books are geared for girls 7 – 14 years old.

The first book in the Work It! Book Collection, fiction book series, introduces an internship program called the Work It Club for girls in San Francisco. The Work It Club places girls in jobs with professional women to learn about what they do. It features real details about the profession highlighted in each book.  The storyline includes, Bella Santi and Sierra Christmas getting an internship with Dr. Lopez at the Seaside Zoo.
What:       Under “Kids, Tweens and Teens, A Positive Psychologist Looks at all Three,” Dr. Barbara will speak to Andrea on girls growing up, keeping their aspirations and drive toward careers, happiness and more. Dr. Barbara will critical issues that can interfere with a girl holding on to her dreams, such as bullying, poor parenting, gossiping, and lack of mentors. Andrea will share how her books help to correct some of the above by providing mentors and encouragement.
When:          Live 4:30pm EDT Monday, at internetvoicesradio.com.

Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein is the author of The Truth, (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything). A National Best Seller for Teens, The Truth is a fictional girl’s diary that with humor and pathos takes all the above issues into account.

For more information please contact Dr. Holstein at 732-571-1200 or encself@aol.com