Epic Selfie Spree: Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Author Of ‘The Truth’, Offers Advice To Parents

Epic Selfie Spree: Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Author Of ‘The Truth’, Offers Advice To Parents – http://ow.ly/Bh9LD

Selfie Contest Now Open To Teens And Tweens To Celebrate Release Of ‘The Truth, Diary Of A Gutsy Tween’

Selfie Contest Now Open To Teens And Tweens To Celebrate Release Of ‘The Truth, Diary Of A Gutsy Tween’- http://ow.ly/zrC7m

Release of ‘The Truth, Diary of a Gutsy Tween’, by Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Scheduled For July 1, 2014

Release of ‘The Truth, Diary of a Gutsy Tween’, by Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Scheduled For July 1, 2014 – http://ow.ly/yycxc

Helping Your Daughter Have a Positive Identity Within Her Family and Her Community.

  • The ‘girl’ in The Truth and Secrets wants to know more about her family. She is close to her mother’s sister, Aunt Belinda, and her Grandmother who she adores.
  • But on her father’s side she only knows her father’s cousin George, who she doesn’t like much at all. (Mostly because he swears a lot).
  • She wonders what her father’s family is really like. Why doesn’t he talk more about his childhood and his parents? Are there secrets?
  • She feels happy to have a loving grandma and aunt but she wants more.
  • And her dad is talking about moving! Yikes! So, if they move, she will loose her friends. This is not good.

How could her parents help her to feel better connected to her extended family?

How can they also reassure her about the family moving and how she will fit into a new school or circle of friends? Anyone have any ideas?

Now on to Your Daughter: How can you help your daughter feel connected in healthy ways to both sides of her family?

How can you help her to stay connected to appropriate friends also, whether you are moving or staying where you live? You may find the following video helpful:

The ‘Girl’ goes to CHINA!

Most of you know by this time that The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) is about to be released in China in an expanded version. It will include both English and Chinese and over 35 Diary entries that have never been seen in this country! The title there will be: How an American Girl Grows Up. Having my book appear in a major country, such as China, for kids and adults to read is a true blessing.

Over the past year so many moms, kids, teachers, grandmas and others have given the book great endorsements and also wonderful feedback, support and wisdom. I have listened carefully to all of you. In fact, already in the Chinese version I have incorporated aspects of what you have been saying. And there will be more changes when The Truth is reprinted and of course your feedback has influenced the second book which I have just finished! Look for it within six months. In the second book, Secrets, the girl is a year older. Lots of adventures and challenges happen. So stay tuned.

Meanwhile, I thought you would enjoy reading one of the excerpts from the Chinese version of The Truth, NEVER seen before in this country.

“My mother took me over to my new school. It is gigantic. I never saw such a big building except the hospital.
The principal was very nice to me. His name is Mr. Palmquist. He is old. I think about 55. I can’t imagine him being mean to the kids. He showed me the classrooms and the lockers in the hallways. Then we went to see the cafeteria that had beautiful paintings on the walls. He said that long ago when artists didn’t have any work, President Roosevelt had a plan. Let them all paint beautiful paintings on public buildings and the government would pay them.
So a bunch of them came to this school and decorated the cafeteria and some of the hallways.
I can’t wait to eat in the cafeteria.
Mr. Palmquist said that he had picked a very nice homeroom teacher for me and I should be very happy there.
I hope I will be happy. Right now I’m just scared and I miss everyone and I wish we had never moved. And that’s the truth.”

As you can see, this excerpt deals with the girl starting school in a new town. She is scared, as most of us are, when new things are happening. As you can see, there are many issues in the above short episode for mom and daughter to talk about. Adjusting to new circumstances is an universal situation we all face. From my point of view, as a positive psychologist, the ‘girl’ is a fictional character in and of herself, but she is also a jumping off point for really important topics, that have lots of feelings and issues surrounding them, that we all need to process at one time or another.

Keep sharing your feelings and ideas! After all, the third book is already on the horizon.

The Truth Official Book Launch

Girls between 8 and 12 can and do everything. However, adolescence can be very hard on girls and years later many a woman has lost touch with her earlier talents, strengths, potential or what makes her happy. I worked to develop a companionship with the 10-year old inside myself. Suddenly, getting to know myself as a child again was serious psychological business.

That’s when I wrote a journal-style book, The Truth (I’m a Girl, I’m Smart and I Know Everything!) If you are a woman, it will make you want to dance with your inner 10-year old and make her energies a part of yourself again. If you are an adult, you will see the child in your life in a much more profound light. You will want to help her hold on to her wisdom, wit, sense of competency and self-esteem. If you are a kid or a ‘tween, you will feel understood and connected to this fictional girl. After all, she is like you. The girl sees so much and knows so much as we all did at 10 or 11. And wouldn”t it be great to hold on to the energy and confidence that can go with that stage of life?

Women and girls of all ages, kids, tweens, teens, parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles thank me for bringing this book to them. It opens the door to communication, and they see themselves, their daughters, nieces and granddaughters in the girl. Girls feel she is speaking for them while women remark that they wish this book had existed when they were growing up.

Now, this book is available on Amazon and those who buy it will also receive nearly $6,500 in free downloadable gifts!


Your friend,
Barbara Becker Holstein


Barbara and book club

Summer is here, but I am still basking in the memories of the fun time I had at the Brielle School Girls Night Out.  Here is a picture of me with a bunch of the girls who had read The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything).  And here is part of the note I received from The G.I.R.L. Club: “We loved when you talked about your book with the club!  We also enjoyed when you talked about your inspiration and it gave us an eye opening experience to get us to do whatever we want to do in life…”

Why as a positive psychologist I chose to write fiction: The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything)

11aLots of time people ask me why I started to write fiction as a positive psychologist. It is a good question. I started writing fiction because I wish to communicate information about how to grow up safe and strong to kids and their parents in a way that they can HEAR me. Lots of time we have great information to share, but nobody takes it in. Why? Sometimes it is too dry, sometimes the timing is off, sometimes it is the speaker”s manner. So to avoid all of those potential set-backs I have chosen fiction. The information is not dry! It is exciting and yet familiar to all of us. All of us were 10, 11 and 12 once. I don”t use my voice, but the voice of a girl who we fall in love with from the first page when she talks about her crush. And I know the timing is right, as every year their are millions of kids getting a year older who have universal concerns about their feelings, their friendships, crushes, bullying, home life, etc.

Let”s take a look at The Truth (I”m a girl, I”m smart and I know everything):
Feeling safe to communicate feelings and thoughts, no matter how personal and/or negative, rather than acting them out, is very important in child and adolescent development.

vThe Truth helps move girls, tweens, teens and their families closer to honest communicating. Every page brings to light feelings and thoughts so universal in nature that almost any page can be used to stimulate family members moving toward a more honest and open place with each other.

v The Truth gives a platform for kids to work through negative feelings about conflict and gives parents a new way of seeing conflict from the vantage point of how it affects their kids.

vThe Truth helps to prevent “mean girls” from developing by showing tweens how to express feelings using words, rather than anger or violence.

v The Truth helps girls see that they are not alone, by being able to so easily identify with the “girl” who is sharing her most personal feelings and thoughts with them directly, via diary form. If Mom also reads The Truth and shares more of her thoughts and feelings while also listening to her daughter”s “real” voice, than a family correction will be made and indeed, the girl will be less alone

vThe Truth also helps kids come to terms with growing up in a less than perfect world. The “girl” is able to do this using many skills that the reader can emulate, such as finding ways to hold on to the best of herself, even as she comes to terms with a world and a set of parents that are less than perfect.

The Truth is resiliency is important. Dr. Sandra Prince-Embury Discusses resiliency with Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, author of The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything)

Dr. Sandra Prince Embury, nationally know expert on resiliency had this to say to Dr. Holstein:33a

The definition of resiliency is the qualities in the child, teenager or adult that allow them to face adversities and social pressures in a way that they can recover from, ride through, maintain functioning, and in some cases, grow, and function even better.  And what I consider the underpinnings of resiliency are basically core aspects of development. 

 The reason that I’m focusing on that right now, especially in children and adolescents, is that in society, we have had to face a lot of adversity, perhaps more adversity than in the past, and there is more of a focus on preparing our youth for adversity.  Of course, women are a special group in that there are special forces on girls and women that need to be dealt with.


But basically, it’s about surviving and dealing with adversity and maintaining your functioning and growing, even in the face of adversity.

One reason I wrote The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) is to show girls how resilient they naturally are.  To learn to recognize their coping powers and their abilities to overcome obstacles and have fun in the process, by identifying with the girl in the book.  As she says on page 19: “I know a million ways to have fun.  I better know they because I feel so rotten when I’m picked last for kickball…”