Dear Diary, I took the most amazing pictures of myself today. I put on my mother’s long earrings, and lots of her make-up. Then I got out her Chinese robe with the big giant flowers on it and put that on. Then after I made sure no one was in the house I started taking selfies of myself. I posed in the craziest positions. I lounged on the couch as if I were lying around on a Greek Island in the the 1920’s. Then I made all sorts of faces, some happy, some sad, some excited, some upset and I just kept taking picture after picture. It was such fun! I felt like I was on some sort of imaginary stage. What was so intereting was after making sad faces I actually felt happier. It felt so good to just be able to do anything I felt I needed to do with my face. I sent a few to Angela and she loved them. She said that when her parents and brothers leave later she will put on a costume of some sort and send pictures back to me. Too soon I had to get out the cold cream and clean off my face and put everything away. Today was my secret. Only Angela knows. And you, Dear Diary.
Epic Selfie Spree: Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Author Of ‘The Truth’, Offers Advice To Parents – http://ow.ly/Bh9LD
Selfie Contest Now Open To Teens And Tweens To Celebrate Release Of ‘The Truth, Diary Of A Gutsy Tween’- http://ow.ly/zrC7m
Selfies Can Be Dangerous: Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Author Of ‘The Truth’, Offers Guidelines – http://ow.ly/AetV5
When I was a girl I knew so many things. I knew a lot of important stuff that my parents and other grown-ups had forgotten. I promised myself that I would find a way to hold on to my knowledge. Then I grew up and became a teacher and a psychologist. I got married and had children. At work, as a psychologist,
I listen to a lot of people’s problems– children and grown-ups. I always try to help them.
One of the things I do is to point out to them what is right with them, rather than what is wrong. Another thing I do is to teach them how to have more fun. I also help them to remember their own wisdom and the truths that they already know in their hearts.
One day I decided to find a way to combine what I already knew as a girl with the knowledge I now have as a psychologist. I had to find a fun way to do this that would really help girls and mothers recognize that what we know growing up is just as important as what we learn later in life. One day, the “girl” just appeared. She knew what to say and how to say it. She did a much better job of sharing the truth than I ever could have imagined. So I just let her go for it. Here is her account of the truth. I hope you enjoy it. Remember your promises to yourself when you grow up and don’t forget to listen to your kids someday.
Growing up is tough. Adults don’t always understand you (even though they were once kids), and children today face increasing pressure to be, look, or act a certain way. Written in the voice of a girl on the cusp of becoming a teenager, The Truth provides young girls with an opportunity to see how a girl, who is in many ways like themselves, handles her toughest problems and most personal thoughts. Each new page brings forth a discussion to help girls handle everyday problems: How do you survive a bully? How do you handle a crush on a boy? What can you do about relentless teasing by your peers? What really matters as you grow older?
The girl in the diary figures out how to survive and even more than survive as she matures, on her way to becoming a teen. She has to leave a lot behind, but she has some amazing ways to hold on to the best of herself. I don’t want to give all of the story away. Grab a copy of the book
and join into the GUTSY GIRL, TWEEN and TEEN generation.
Release of ‘The Truth, Diary of a Gutsy Tween’, by Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Scheduled For July 1, 2014 – http://ow.ly/yycxc
Every parents dream is for their child to grow up successful in life, with perhaps a loving spouse, a great job, and a happy family. The dreams of parents and their child may differ quite a bit in how these signs of success are supposed to transform from dreams to reality.
Even as kids, each child begins to find herself, who she likes, who she hates and what she dreams of becoming when she grows up. From the playground on kids form small cliques with other children who share similar interests, and eventually they form emotional and romantic bonds with others.
This can be hard and scary for both teens and parents alike. As parents, we want to protect our children from the pain and heartache that can come with romantic relationships. We want to know that the other person will love and
protect our children the way we have done. We also might not approve of the choice in partners our child chose if their standards don’t meet or differ from ours.
For the teen herself, knowing that she is in conflict with her parents, it can be hard to confide any longer with her parents about the real stuff of her life. She may want to, but fears disapproval or embarrassment.
This is perfectly normal and it doesn’t make you a bad parent, but here are a few things you can do:
- Keep In Communications!
Talk to your teen about their day, interests, and friends. Sometimes all you need to do is ask.
- Have an open mind!
This is very important. Keeping an open mind to your child’s sexuality and opinions, even if they differ from yours will build a stronger relationship.
- Trust them!
Trust your teen. After all, you raised them. If you trust and believe in your teenager, then they will trust and believe in you.
- Listen to them!
Sometimes your teen doesn’t want advice. All they really want is someone to listen and understand them, and maybe a shoulder to cry on. This can be really helpful and your teen will want to come and confide in you more often.
- Love them always!
This is the most important. Your teen needs to know you love them unconditionally. More than just hearing that you love them, your teen needs to feel it and see that you love them despite their mistakes, opinions, or sexuality.
If you use these tips, I assure you that your teen will grow up strong and successful and have you in part to thank, whether she ever actually says the words, you will know she feels gratitude for your kindness as she found her own place in the adult world.
First of all, a big thank you to Joanne Yelenik for inviting me to participate in the tour. Joanne is the author of “Eucalyptus Leaves: A Never to be Imagined Friendship in Israel.” The novel unfolds the events and developing relationship between a young man and an older, sophisticated woman over a two year period as they settle into their new-old, much loved homeland, Israel. You can find Joanne at her blog: http://eucalyptus-leaves.com/
The way this blog tour works is that we each answer the same four questions about our writing process. So here goes:
- 1) What am I working on?
Right now I am ‘recovering’ from many projects over the last several years. In the past three years I wrote my first adult romance, mystery novel: Next Year in Jerusalem! now renamed Around Every Corner Romance & Mystery… I also revised my book The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) and sent it off to be published July 1, 2014 by Sky Pony Press. The new title is The Truth, Diary of A Gutsy Tween. Also in the past year, I have written two different versions of a play titled The Locket, which is based on The Truth. The play has been performed as a work in progress twice in Asbury Park.
Can you see that I may need some time to just chill out? And I am trying to take it each and every beautiful day that we have at the Jersey Shore. Oh, but I can’t rest too much. Secrets: You Tell Me Yours and I’ll Tell You Mine… maybe, the second book in The Truth series, in which the girl is a year older, but not necessary a year wiser, is due at Sky Pony Press very shortly. I’ve already started revising it. Tomorrow, let’s see….what is the weather forecast? I guess that will determine what gets done on Secrets.
- 2) How does my work differ from others of its genre?
This is such an interesting question. Of course there are other diary books out for girls and tweens and even boys. But the difference between mine and say a series like Diary of a Wimpy Kid, is that The Truth, Diary of a Gutsy Tween, has been written by a positive psychologist (that’s me!) and every page is designed to encourage positive thinking, resiliency, positive self-regard, hopefulness, optimism, a recognition and valuing of one’s talents, strengths and potential, and much more. Every page can be used as a separate guidance lesson if one wished to. At the same time, the book is a page turner in its own right and kids enjoy the quick, easy read as they would any other really good fiction.
- 3) Why do I write what I do?
I write what I do because I am passionate about building kids up and helping their parents, teachers, grandparents, etc. better understand what kids feel and think. This is my life work and to find a way to weave it into drama has been an added gift!
- 4) How does my writing process work?
Each book has a different process. The Truth, Diary of a Gutsy Tween, began as a book designed for adult women. The very first draft was based on a girl, actually the girl inside the woman talking to her, sharing with the woman how to live a more fulfilling life. The girl’s wisdom was adorable and amazing and based on one of my other important psychological concepts, The Seven Gateways to Happiness. However, the book itself never found the light of day. Eventually, I decided that the girl could just talk for herself and it would make a better read. Basically, I banished the woman. I’ve let her come back to life in other ways. For example, the characters in Around Every Corner have some of her attributes. Once the woman left the book, I decided a diary format was the easiest way to get the girl to speak to strangers. The diary format has been a hit. There have been several versions and now I’m so excited to be presenting the longest and deepest version to the world, July 1! This has been an amazing journey for the girl and for me! I hope you read The Truth, Diary of a Gutsy Tween and write to me at firstname.lastname@example.org
And now I am going to pass the baton to our next blog tour author who you will find at: http://monaberman22.wordpress.com/ Here is a little about Mona: MONA BERMAN was born, bred and lived in Johannesburg until 2010 when she made Aliya to Israel. She has four degrees, four daughters, many grandchildren and now great-grandchildren in Israel. Her writing life began in earnest with the publication of a work of non-fiction Silence in the Fiction of Elie Wiesel (2001), two works of fiction, E-mail from a Jewish Mother (2002) and E-mail from a Jewish Grandmother (2008), a memoirRemembering Irma – Irma Stern: A Memoir with Letters (2003) and Serendipity in my Seventies (2012).
We all hope you are enjoying moving from one blog to another and learning more about how each of us create our written works!
Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein To Release “The Truth, Diary of a Gutsy Tween” – http://ow.ly/xSiwz