Category Archives: Amazon

Growing Up Isn’t Easy!

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In The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) the girl talks, at times, about not wanting to grow up.

Feelings about not wanting to grow up are common and often not discussed, as kids realize that most of the time parents expect them to want to grow up.

We as adults have often forgotten about how hard it is to move into adolescence. The bodily changes alone, are overwhelming. How many of us suffered with pimples, anxieties about getting our period, and all sorts of other issues? Just about all of us, although these issues may seem very far away now. I remember some mood swings that seemed to come out of the blue when I was 11. Hormones raging through my body, I’m sure didn’t help.

We have to be compassionate and helpful to those young ladies in our lives who are transitioning. Giving advise, and sharing about our own ups and downs as we moved through those years can take the pressure off a lot of what is happening.

The girl in The Truth realizes there are some great things about not being a grown-up yet. For example, she doesn’t have to earn a living. She can focus most of her attention on herself, her school work and other interests. Later in life it is harder to focus on ourselves. Multi-tasking takes over and there is little time for self-development.

At the same time, it is for most of us, a blessing to be part of a family of some sort, and to have a chance to participate in raising children. It is often exciting to work at a job and to have the power to make decisions about the course of our lives.

So really, all stages of life have their benefits and their losses. If we can stay light hearted as we see some of the pluses and minuses and keep a sense of humor, we can have such fun talking to kids about our stage of life as well as listening to the successes and frustrations that our kids feel about their lives.

The simple message is: Keep sharing. Your daughter will grow up even if she doesn’t want to for the moment. Don’t panic. Keep talking and sharing. Laugh and cuddle. Spend time together and give her your wisdom. But…make sure your don’t block out hers! She has wisdom also! Enjoy listening to it.

The Second Book in The Truth Series, by Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein has arrived!

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Be the first to get your copy of the second book in The Truth Series, called Secrets I’ll tell you Mine if you Tell me Yours…maybe, by going to Amazon Today

Secrets Book Cover

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“What a delightful book! The girl made me smile. I could relate to her on many levels- from her first crush to being picked last for sports. She”s not only funny, she”s insightful. Girls at any age could learn from her.”
~Allie Triggs

The Truth Official Book Launch

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Girls between 8 and 12 can and do everything. However, adolescence can be very hard on girls and years later many a woman has lost touch with her earlier talents, strengths, potential or what makes her happy. I worked to develop a companionship with the 10-year old inside myself. Suddenly, getting to know myself as a child again was serious psychological business.

That’s when I wrote a journal-style book, The Truth (I’m a Girl, I’m Smart and I Know Everything!) If you are a woman, it will make you want to dance with your inner 10-year old and make her energies a part of yourself again. If you are an adult, you will see the child in your life in a much more profound light. You will want to help her hold on to her wisdom, wit, sense of competency and self-esteem. If you are a kid or a ‘tween, you will feel understood and connected to this fictional girl. After all, she is like you. The girl sees so much and knows so much as we all did at 10 or 11. And wouldn”t it be great to hold on to the energy and confidence that can go with that stage of life?

Women and girls of all ages, kids, tweens, teens, parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles thank me for bringing this book to them. It opens the door to communication, and they see themselves, their daughters, nieces and granddaughters in the girl. Girls feel she is speaking for them while women remark that they wish this book had existed when they were growing up.

Now, this book is available on Amazon and those who buy it will also receive nearly $6,500 in free downloadable gifts!

Enjoy!

Your friend,
Barbara Becker Holstein

Fun at Girl’s Night Out at Brielle School and the Girls Club in Manasquan School.

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The picture is of me, Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein at the Girl’s Club that meets in the Manasquan School.  Soon I’ll have a picture of me at the Girl’s Club Girl’s Night Out at the Brielle School, which is located just a few miles away.  Both visits were such a treat for me.  In Manasquan I got to chat with the girls at the fifth grade level and again another day at the sixth grade level.  All were reading The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything).  At the Brielle School, the kids were sixth graders and they had finished reading the book.  I learned so much from the girls.  I’m very happy to report that the diary format appealed to all the girls and that they felt that the girl in the book really thinks in her head like a fifth or sixth grader.  All were interested in a second book in the series.  So many of the girls wanted to know how I started to write and was the girl from real life.  I explained that I myself started keeping a diary in the fourth grade and that certainly helped me practice writing.  (Even if the spelling was awful).  I also shared that some of the events that happened to the girl happened to me or clients of mine, or friends.  She was really a merger of all of us.  As she should be to share universal truths.  One compliment I received was that the book stayed true to the very end in tone and quality, rather than rushing to a conclusion that felt artificial or lacking.

Why as a positive psychologist I chose to write fiction: The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything)

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11aLots of time people ask me why I started to write fiction as a positive psychologist. It is a good question. I started writing fiction because I wish to communicate information about how to grow up safe and strong to kids and their parents in a way that they can HEAR me. Lots of time we have great information to share, but nobody takes it in. Why? Sometimes it is too dry, sometimes the timing is off, sometimes it is the speaker”s manner. So to avoid all of those potential set-backs I have chosen fiction. The information is not dry! It is exciting and yet familiar to all of us. All of us were 10, 11 and 12 once. I don”t use my voice, but the voice of a girl who we fall in love with from the first page when she talks about her crush. And I know the timing is right, as every year their are millions of kids getting a year older who have universal concerns about their feelings, their friendships, crushes, bullying, home life, etc.

Let”s take a look at The Truth (I”m a girl, I”m smart and I know everything):
Feeling safe to communicate feelings and thoughts, no matter how personal and/or negative, rather than acting them out, is very important in child and adolescent development.

vThe Truth helps move girls, tweens, teens and their families closer to honest communicating. Every page brings to light feelings and thoughts so universal in nature that almost any page can be used to stimulate family members moving toward a more honest and open place with each other.

v The Truth gives a platform for kids to work through negative feelings about conflict and gives parents a new way of seeing conflict from the vantage point of how it affects their kids.

vThe Truth helps to prevent “mean girls” from developing by showing tweens how to express feelings using words, rather than anger or violence.

v The Truth helps girls see that they are not alone, by being able to so easily identify with the “girl” who is sharing her most personal feelings and thoughts with them directly, via diary form. If Mom also reads The Truth and shares more of her thoughts and feelings while also listening to her daughter”s “real” voice, than a family correction will be made and indeed, the girl will be less alone

vThe Truth also helps kids come to terms with growing up in a less than perfect world. The “girl” is able to do this using many skills that the reader can emulate, such as finding ways to hold on to the best of herself, even as she comes to terms with a world and a set of parents that are less than perfect.

Review of The Truth (I'm a girl, I'm smart and I know everything) by a ten year old girl.

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A Kid”s Review

“I thought the book and discussion really went deep into a girl”s life; boys, crushes and dealing with yourself. I learned that people should express what they feel inside and always be truthful.” 5th Grader (posted on Amazon)

What do you want in the next edition of The Truth(I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything)?

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19aThe book is selling so fast that I am already thinking about reprinting.   The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) was #6 in the top 100 on Amazon today in the category of BEING A TEEN.  Thanks to everyone who helped with that rank by buying the book!  And thanks for telling me that yes, there is a place for the world of positive psychology and fiction to merge!

So, I thought you might want to share some ideas with me.  In the next edition, would you like: 1. more secret diary entries that have never been public before?  2. Pages from the second book in the series where the girl is a year older?  and/or 3. More questions and activities you can do after you read the book?  Please let me know what you would prefer!

The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) is #11 in top 100 on Amazon for BEING A TEEN

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I would think the girl in The Truth would enjoy knowing that she is captivating the hearts of girls and moms in lots of different places.  She loves to travel, but so far has only traveled to one place that wasn’t where she lived.  That was the time she got to take a ride in a small plane, sitting alone in the tiny cockpit, with the pilot directly in front of her.  What a ride that was.  Going up, up, up into the sky, seeing all the houses and then neighborhoods below her, and realzing that her very own parents had become tiny specks.  It was an amazing adventure for her, filled with a little fear, offset by holding the pilot’s hand.  Of course, he was handsome and dashing and that helped quiet her fears.  She came down all too soon, back to the somewhat dull reality of visiting her relatives.  That episode is on p.53 of the book.  (She tells it better than I can).

She would be amazed to hear that people are sitting at what looks something like a typewriter and ordering her book from a place called Amazon.  She does know about THE amazon from her geography class, but what is this?  Is her book being stored in the jungle somewhere? 

What I do know for certain is that she wants to hear from you.  So please write to her after you read The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything).  Tell her what your greatest adventure has been or have fun explaining what a computer is.  Be pen pals.