Why Lockets Are So Important in Books for Ten Year Old Girls And All The Rest of Us!

Did you ever own a locket? If you did you probably remember the magic of first checking to see if it really opened and then trying to figure out what to put in the picture spots. Usually there were two, one on each side. If you received your first locket when you were a girl, as I did, then you probably chose yourself for one of the pictures. At least I did. It made sense to me, as I had no siblings and if I put pictures in of my mom and dad, then where would I go?

What if I had a crush? Actually I did, but I never would have dreamed of puttling the boy’s picture in. My crush was even to personal to be hidden in a locket.

I liked to wear my locket as it gave me something lovely to touch when I was bored or thinking abstractly in school. It was engraved with some small hearts in a pattern and I could follow the pattern.

So when I was writing The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) it was natural for me to put a locket in the story. And for the girl it became very important as she, like most of us, came to value her locket. But for her, unlike me, the locket became a perfect vessel for a secret that she was trying to take into adulthood.

I can’t give it away, that would be unfair. But I do want to share with you some remarks from my associate journalist, Linh, the girl in Vietnam who read The Truth in Vietenemese and then wrote to me. She actually gave the girl a name as she read the book. Here are a few remarks she made about the locket:

“I decided to choose her the name “Funny” when I first read her diary two years ago. Today, I’m writing about her, specifically about her locket and her feelings about it.
On Funny’s birthday – March 30th – she was given money and a lot of gifts. However, maybe the present that she took most of her notice to was the necklace with a locket her aunt gave her. The locket was heart-shaped and lovely with spaces to put two photos in. Funny was extremely happy and satisfied with the gift Aunt Belinda gave her. That is to say, she ran around her room eagerly and kept the locket on her chest before putting the necklace around her neck. And in the locket, there was a picture of hers which was put in by Aunt Belinda. What about the other space ? Which photo would Funny put in, along with her own picture ?
After going downstairs, Funny talked again to her grandmother. Her .grandmother asked her whether she would put her little brother’s picture in the cute locket. Funny didn’t answer, but she thought that she would never put any photo of her little brother’s in the locket with her photo. She wanted to put Paul’s picture – the boy that she had fallen in love with before – in the locket instead. She thought couples often put each other’s picture in a locket like that. But she could find no ways to have one photo of Paul’s. At first, she intended to use Paul’s picture in his student card, but the picture couldn’t be neither taken out nor small enough to be in Funny’s locket. Funny wanted to borrow the Brownie camera of her parents; unfortunately, they wouldn’t permit her to bring it to school. It was such a pity !
There are many things else about Funny that we can discuss more. But still her lovable locket with Funny’s insighful emotions are very awesome, to me personally. Do you also think so, girls ?”

Do you have memories of a locket? Please share by writing to me at drbarbara@enchantedself.com or on the facebook page: The Truth for Girls.

Why Did I Write The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know Everything)?

Many know me as a positive psychologist, and a therapist. Others remember me as a school psychologist and there are still many who remember me as a first and second grade teacher. Perhaps theirs!

But we are always more than our outer self and those who know me personally know that I am a keeper of the secret voices and issues that we all face as girls and women.

I learned from my father, Dr. Harry A. Becker, Superintendent of Schools in Norwalk, Connecticut and first president of the Norwalk Community Collge, that opportunity is critical for women. Women who don’t make or have a chance to make wise educational decisions may be at the mercy of their society.

My dad spent his professional life designing programs of education and training that would help both men and women find places of dignity for themselves in the work place. He started the School of Dental Hygeine at the University of Bridgeport, the School of Nursing there and the School of Education. In Norwalk, the Norwalk Community College has had 172,000 students study there since the first courses were offered around l970.

I believe that his passion to helping woman think through how they will educate themselves and still live a full life if they desire of raising children, marriage, etc. has fused within in me into a passion for helping girls and women recognize their own potential and have the courage to hold on to and appreciate the best of themselves.

This is no easy task, as what is so fun and playful when we are 10 or 11 becomes very hard to stay part of ourselves when hormones and media pressures start to flow around 12. And by the time we are grown-ups other pressures such as holding a job, marriage, babies, aging parents, money, etc. keep us from delighting in and encouraging the sparks within ourselves that are our talents, strengths and potential.

But we all know that a sober book about this subject may not do the trick. What can help is the use of drama. Good books and plays leave their mark because we are emotionally aroused and infused afterwards.

Watch my video on what I decided to do:

That’s what I decided to do with The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything). I decided to write a great easy read book for girls, a profound book, like The Little Prince in its simplicity. And like Laura books about The Little House on The Prairie, read enough, with a girl speaking from her heart, so that all girls could relate.

But it wasn’t enough just for them to related to the girl. I needed the moms and teachers and grandmoms to also relate. And I think I have achieved that. We all have the laughing, delightful girl inside of us, who is still full of energy and talents. We just need to find her again and again, celebrate her and let her come alive.

The girl in The Truth finds away to hold on to her girl as she is about to become a teen and I know the energy and wisdom she shares is helping the rest of us also hold on to the girl inside of ourselves!

Read More...